“Me at 38”
Free of the burden of me
Of the need to fulfill every desire
To fill every hole
To find all the pieces in this puzzle
A puzzle I never could control
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Free to just be
To let go and let the pieces fall into place
To truly believe in myself
To not just repeat what I now know
But to feel it intensely in my bones
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Free to make the right decisions
Without consulting the world
Free of stupid thoughts and able
To listen to my voice, my thoughts, my heart
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Free because I don’t need anyone
I simply want to share my life with everyone
Embracing all the love that surrounds me
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Free to finally be me
Gray hair, wrinkles and fat
You couldn’t pay me to go back
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This feeling has no price
It’s not for sale, there’s no negotiating
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Free to roam, free to love, free to leave it all behind…
-AK Cespedes
This is the truth and I’ve never felt freer, more creative, and more confident in my life. We gain this as we get older and as long as we are open to change for the better, we will and we can change for the better. I’m excited even to be 40 because I know it can only get better. And trust me, it hasn’t been a bed of roses, a walk in the park, or any other analogy you may have heard. I’ve been twice divorced, I’ve lost my front tooth, had a step-daughter who went through cancer, but somewhere in the depth of my heart I knew that things could only get better and in spite of everything dark in my life, I did believe in the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s important to hang in there and be strong and have good people in your life and most importantly it is so important to learn to listen to your gut. The sooner you can develop that skill, fine-tune your voice, it takes practice but it will keep you from making terrible mistakes. We have the answer to all our issues; we just need to learn to listen to ourselves and God! He gives us signs EVERY SECOND OF THE DAY! I promise you, you just need to keep your eyes, ears, mind and heart open!
About Ana Karina Cespedes:
Peruvian-born, Miami-resident, daughter, sister, friend, traveler, photographer, food-lover, drinker, spectacular. Check out her amazing photographs at: flickr.com/bluedress7
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